I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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