i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
