is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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