She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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