You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
