she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
