Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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