In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
