i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
