You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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