He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
