we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
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