You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
