The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
