I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize