yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Randomize
