do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
