Having a random hookup so left but love u
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
