so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
wow bdsm is so cute
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
