how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
