Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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