He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
