what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
