I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
