office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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