just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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