I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize