I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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