butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize
