I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize