she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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