im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
where are my eyebrows?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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