it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Watching her eat just hurts me
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
