ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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