I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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