Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
