how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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