Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
