I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
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