dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
