no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
