Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
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