The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
We have started to decorate penises.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
