He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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