some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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