you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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