one two three fourrrrnication!
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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