It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
40s are totally the cure
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize
