He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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