found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Randomize
